How to tell you’re a nerd: Method 245 (or “Is that a terrifying, classic film villain on your TV screen, or are you just happy to see me?”)
The thought occurs to you that if your younger self from twenty years ago were suddenly transported in time to the present, the world would seem very both fascinating and a bit scary, just based on the fact that you have a digital video recorder that allows you to record high definition versions of television programs without a VCR, which you can use to fast forward commercials.
Furthermore, two of the television shows on your DVR are centered around terrifying film villains Norman Bates and Hannibal Lecter, the latter being broadcast on a major television network, which bewilders your younger self even as it confounds your present self, considering that people once found shows like Married With Children and The Simpsons edgy and controversial.
You realize from recent experience that staying off of Facebook for three months and then finally signing back in is disorienting in much the same way as being suddenly transported into the future (or woken from a coma). You find out that you have missed major events that had only been shared as status updates, not unlike the following:
Engagements; pregnancies; new pets; friends who have moved, changed careers, or become vegan; new hairstyles, beards, and tattoos; as well as grown men who are nearly 30 years old, suddenly going from liking heavy metal to posting cringe-worthy statements in favor of the musical sound of the band Fun.
Recently, you were asked to identify your ideal career, which took all of your willpower to not answer as follows:
“Preferably, I’d go with a line of work in time travel, but my second and third choices would be ‘intergalactic explorer/ lothario’ or a maester in Westeros.”