You have recently begun using the interactive recommendation program called “Max” on your Netflix streaming account, which suggests titles to watch by way of a programmed series of pithy voice-over prompts, saying things like, “I think you’ll really like this one,” or “Do you trust me?”
However, your interactions with this program have been frustrating, and have caused a few strange looks from those who have entered the room in time to hear you yelling things at your television, not unlike the following:
“Way to go genius! Why in the hell would I want to watch that person’s second stand-up comedy special since I just selected ‘Not Interested’ when you suggested his first stand-up special five seconds ago?”
You get frustrated while searching for a specific television show to stream on Netflix so you decide to check other video streaming services to which you subscribe (including the new application from Amazon.com). As you switch services, you proclaim, “I don’t care what they said in Ghostbusters, I’m crossing the streams…”
You are spending your Valentine’s Day alone, eating leftovers and streaming detective shows on Netflix, taking solace in the thought that while you are not currently dating anyone, at least you saved some money this year by not having to get a gift.
While streaming an episode of The X-Files on Netflix, you become annoyed with an archeological graduate student character who brings her dog to the museum where she works because as a student in a special collections library science course, you know that bringing animals into a museum (which is a type of special collection) is about as reasonable as a carpenter breeding termites as a hobby and then releasing them in his workshop.
It’s at this point when you realize that you have raised no objections to the extraterrestrial plots, supernatural encounters, and government conspiracies presented in The X-Files. Only when a character brings a dog into a museum (an action that would be considered incompetent among those in your professional field) do you find yourself saying, “Oh come on! That would never happen!”
Upon adding a Bill Hicks stand-up performance to your Netflix Instant Queue, you become extremely offended that Netflix would dare suggest that a Jamie Kennedy DVD was “similar” to Bill Hicks in any way.