Monthly Archives: May 2012
You spent an entire afternoon (to no avail) searching online for a compact disc or legal mp3 file featuring the song “Red Harvest” by Paul Saax, used in the opening and closing credits of a 1988 thriller starring James Spader called Jack’s Back.
This Memorial Day, you find yourself watching the 2007 film There Will Be Blood starring Daniel Day-Lewis. After the final confrontation scene, you say to aloud, “I feel like drinking a milkshake.”
You recently got into an argument with someone over the content of your Netflix queue, as you were hoping to show a friend the Nicolas Winding Refn film Drive, which reminded you of the Michael Mann films of the 1980s. However, your recommendation was rebuffed because someone had recently told them that Ryan Gosling “whines too much” in the film. You find this shocking, explaining to your friend that nowhere in the film does that occur, but you are disbelieved and overruled.
Having never taken an interest in the Swamp Thing comic books, you develop a desire to read the Alan Moore version of the series after hearing someone talk about it for five minutes. A critical component in the genesis of this new-found interest was the assertion that even though Moore’s version is not considered part of the main Swamp Thing canon, many consider it to be the superior work in the series.
You are slightly concerned that you’ve been brainwashed by the commercials on HULU because after seeing the same advertisement for the Max Payne 3 video game played at least thirty times in a row while you were watching a mini-marathon of various television shows on HULU, you ended up purchasing the Max Payne 3 video game.
But I ask, if anyone saw the following video thirty times, would they not be tempted?
*PARENTAL ADVISORY SUGGESTED*
How to tell you’re a nerd: Method 159 (or “I wanna be like Mike… well, not really, but it’s still cool!”)
You consider the following video, portraying Michael Fassbender as an artificial life-form, to be the next logical choice to follow the previous posting of Guy Pearce as Peter Weyland. This is due to the fact that the video serves as another promotion for the upcoming Ridley Scott film Prometheus, and because it is simply an amazing example of how this film will undoubtedly be awesome.
So without further ado, meet David…
Viewing the video below only deepens your appreciation for Guy Pearce and increases your enthusiasm for the upcoming Ridley Scott film Prometheus…
In the course of a single, casual conversation with a fellow science fiction fan, you employed the use of words and phrases from multiple science fiction and fantasy franchises. This included: several words in Klingon, two phrases from Farscape, words specific to Firefly, and several phrases from Stephen King’s Dark Tower series.
Furthermore, you made a point of being the one to utilize references to the Dark Tower because the individual to whom you were speaking stubbornly refuses to read those books. Normally, you wouldn’t mind, but that person is basing their decision entirely on the basis of reading a Wikipedia synopsis of the books, which led to the misguided declaration that they seem “uninteresting.”
Therefore, you get a bit of selfish pleasure when you accuse your compatriot of forgetting the face of their father, and you hear, “What are you talking about?”
More often than not, when you are asked about “fun plans for Saturday night,” you respond with something not unlike the following:
“Well, I’ve been reading this new book…”
You tracked down a John Hurt movie related to the supernatural called The Shout simply because you saw a five-second clip of it featured in another movie.
When someone posts a vague, negative post on Facebook alluding to having a bad day and/or lamenting about their life, you always think the following:
If you’re going to use Facebook as a platform for complaining, at least be funny about it. It’s the least you could do.
You recently experienced peer pressure, but it was mostly about others trying to convince you to pursue a Ph.D.
While waiting for someone, you wander into a book store and find yourself drawn to the graphic novels, science fiction, and fantasy books.
You then begin taking inventory of these printed works as if they were trading cards. Your mind races over them, thinking: Got it, got it, need it, got it, need it, need it… etc.
Due to a busy (and borderline annoying) academic schedule, you keep having to say no when asked if you’ve seen certain current television shows or films in the last two months. Then a window of free time allowed you to answer the question of whether or not you had been to the movies lately as follows:
“No, but I did rent a thriller called Brake in which Stephen Dorff apparently spends the entire film locked in the trunk of a car.”